CIM Marathon Race Report - Race of my life...

I had the race of my life and I learned some valuable, valuable lessons in the meantime. The journey from when Team Rogue started to now has made me a better person in the process along with a better runner. More on this later.

Race report: We (Dee, Steve, Lori, and myself) all got into California on Friday afternoon. We made it over to the expo, to a drug/grocery store, and to a nice dinner on Friday night. Saturday, we spent it going to the start to drop off Steve, Lori, Leslie and Jimmy for their 13 mile long run as Dee and I drove the course and aided as water stops. Went to the Team meeting and it was off to relax. Dee, Lori, and I went to Macy's in search for better clothing attire. I admit I'm not fashionable in my wardrobe, but they were determined to get me in some nice jeans. Made it back to the hotel and we relaxed for the rest of the evening. Crucial mistake, but not regretting it, I switched my Garmin from four screens with Time, Pace, Avg Pace, and Distance to only two screens. Time/Avg Pace. I also planned to wear a regular stop watch on my right hand for fear of my Garmin dying, it had done this in past Soulbusters, so wanted a backup. I was planning on wearing my 3:56 pace band on my left arm, and 4:00 on my right.

Race morning: I woke up at 1:30 and it was impossible to go back asleep. I tossed and turned, trying to not to wake Lori, and then around 2:00am all I heard was, "Fool..." and I felt giggly. Dee was wide awake too. We scurried out to the hallway as I ate my muffin with peanut butter, then we decided to go back to attempt to rest. Dee went back to sleep, and I started playing an iPhone game that Lori showed me and beat her record high :) Around 3:00 I decided to try again. I fell asleep, but quickly awoke without the alarm at 3:45am. We started getting dressed and ready to go. I miraculously took a poop :) TMI, I know.. but the ones that know me, know that this is a huge issue for me. I was delighted that it happened.

Met in the lobby, got teary eyed hearing Sisson speak. I just kept repeating and going over with Dee... stay on pace till 19, effort, relax uphills, don't push on the downhills, DON'T RUN 15-19 FASTER THAN MGP, let it go at 19, charge 21 bridge, yell "is that all you've got?" take it home... count the streets down. I repeated this over and over and over and over. Stay focused. This is my race. This is my day. I've done the hardwork. This is SoulBuster 4, time to make it happen. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. The bus ride over was the same thing. Just kept repeating, checking in with Dee here and there, but for the most part the Rogue members on the bus were quiet. Katie, Jon, Brenda, Mike, Clemmie, and Andrea were all on my bus. I was so relaxed, that I think I might have fallen asleep for a few minutes. We got to the start, and the nerves kicked in. Clemmie and Andrea went to the potties. Then Dee. Then they all came back. We waited till 6:30 to venture out. It got there in no time.

6:30, we head off the bus, hit the portopotties with NO lines :) I took another small poop, yay me... and Dee and I went to the start. We found the 4:00 pacer and Dee introduced herself and we just stood there. "Can you believe we're here???" I went over the same race strategy, repeated it one last time. Gave Dee and big huge hug, told her I believed in her, this was our day and I loved her. Then I stood there... hahahaha. She said, "FOOL!" and I said, "What??" She said go get up there. I was going to run 9:00's till 19 which is a 3:56, then take it home at 19. So I thought for a millisecond, "I can stand by you if I want!!' and she gave me that look and I knew. I knew if I started with her, I wouldn't want to leave so I proceeded up further. I was no in back of the 3:50 and in front of the 4:00. Star Spangled Banner played and I teared up. I kept thinking... "this is my race, this is my race, this is my day, stay focused..." Race started...

Mile 1, Garmin clocked an 8:57. Immediate thought, holy shit, I'm doing it. Teared up, and remembered not to waste emotional energy, stay focused.

Miles 2-3, 8:54, 9:01. Garmin showed average pace of 8:57, but when I got to the mile markers, the pace was right at 9:00. I did a quick thinking and I can't go by my Garmin, chip time will be official, so I made a mental note that the Garmin was 3 seconds off per mile. Saw Ruth and Steve, got a high five from Steve and yelled out, "I'm on pace, motherf-er!!' Smiled and was on my way.

Mile 4) 8:56
5) 8:55
6) 9:05
7) 9:02
8) 9:05
9) 9:04
10) 8:49

Miles were clicking away. My 3:56 pace band was even splits, so it was easy AT FIRST to calculate how fast or how slow I was by my watch at each mile. I remember being a few seconds too fast, then slowly, 10 seconds too slow, 15 seconds, 32 seconds. The miles were going, my legs felt great. The hills I remember conscienceously saying "Effort, relaxed, it's ok." Then on the downhills, I would just relax and let it go. No intentional effort to make up time, just let gravity take it. I was on pace. I was doing it. This was my day. Over and over, I was talking to myself, outloud, I didn't care. I'm doing this. I'm doing this.

11) 8:57
12) 9:12
13) 8:56
14) 9:03
15) 9:05

I was there, up to mile 15. I just kept clicking them away. This was an advanatage to not having my pace on my Garmin... I was going by feel. My race was happening. I had a quick reminiscence of Austin 2007. I fell apart at 13 and here I was at 15 and felt on fire. Legs felt great, quads felt used, but overall I was feeling awesome!! My mistake and freak out came at mile 16. Mental note, and verbally, DON'T RUN THESE NEXT FEW MILES FAST, DON'T RUN THESE NEXT FEW MILES FAST!!! Sisson said he's not responsible if I run these fast... I saw the downhill, got tempted and just ran. Mile 16 was 9:15, but I didn't know my splits, so I kept running.

I got to mile 17 and misread my f-ing, damn watch. I was supposed to be at
2:33:01 and at the 17 mile marker I read 2:32 and FREAKED OUT. I thought I had just run an 8:00 instead of a 9:00 min mile and put on the brakes. I panicked. I didn't have my pace on my Garmin, so I had no clue. I wasted too much energy freaking out and slowing down. Instead I should have gone by my feel, because I was fine.

17) 9:33
18) 9:30
19) 9:41 (one of these miles, I yes... took a crap in someones front yard. Only a 20 second poop. It was fast, but it was necessary. Perpetuem that I had taken for the last two long runs, was messing with my stomach, so I ditched it.)

I was (now looking at my splits) 1:24 too slow for a 3:56, but in my mind, I was so discombobbled that I switched to my right arm. I started using my 4:00 paces, but forgot to switch the mentality about my 3:56. From here on, I was REALLY slower than I was mentally thinking. Every time I thought I was 1, 2, 3 minutes slower I thought I was still under 4:00, but I was slowly creeping up and it was slipping away, but i had no idea. I didn't know my paces at each mile, and i was too confused to do the math.

20) 9:18, this pickup was the start of my retarded running. I felt that I was negative splitting. In my mind, I was running 8:30's, 8:00's. I thought I was running the race Steve prescribed. In my mind, I was on fire. The pickup now that I see was my too slow miles from freaking out thinking I was running too fast from 9:41 to 9:18. In my mind, I was running 9:00 to 8:30.

I saw Steve and Ruth, and Ruth said I was still on course for 4:00 and I remember thinking, 'Yeah.. I'm WAY ahead!" She ran by me for a few seconds, gave me some hints and was on my way. I was confused on my paces, but looking back, I'm glad that I was on the reverse end of it. I'm glad that I ran these next miles happy and thinking I was flying rather than reverse. I wasn't bonking in past marathons. My legs were tired, but I wasn't dying. I didn't have the Austin 2008 shuffle. Dee did New Orleans so she ran me in from 20-26, and I was barely moving back then. My breath was short, my legs were gone, and I was shuffling. Not today. My legs were turning over and in my mind I was crusing.

Not so much, looking at my splits, but I've come a long way from past marathons where the last miles were always in the 11:00's, and 12:00's, and even 13:00's trying to hang on.

21) 9:48
22) 9:57
23) 9:39
24) 9:55
25) 9:48

Here is where I realized that I was off. My watch said 3:55:17. It's wierd how I remember the exact split, but there it was. Another mass confusion on my part. "What the fuck??" I should be at the finish, is this right?? I even looked back to make sure the mile marker said 25 and not 26. I should be crossing now??? What happened?? And it dawned on me... I was using the 4:00, not the 3:56. They saying running is mental and boy is it ever. The minute I noticed this, I literally gave up for about 10-15 seconds. I just kept going over and over, "What happened?? Did this mean I was on pace earlier, what were my paces just a minute ago, how did I let this happen?" I did the number one thing Steve said not to do. I fell asleep. I fell asleep from miles 20-25. I was dead asleep. In my mind, I THOUGHT I was running faster. I wasn't checking my times and being anal like I was in the beginning and this is where I left my race. The miles when I saw Lori's ass (thank you very much) the miles when I screamed "Is that all you've got" were all asleep. I was in my own little lala land and I fell asleep. At mile 25, I actually stopped and walked through a water stop, still just going over and over and over trying to figure out where I screwed up, then I remembered past marathons. I can't give up, I can still do this. I also thought, if I'm on pace for over a 4:00, where's Dee?? I finished my last mile, Sisson appeared out of nowhere and said, "Let's go, let's go, let's go..." and I picked it up. Two seconds later, I see this bobbling red 4:05, and I told the guy ahead of me, "Oh hell no!" We can't let him pass us, goooo, I'll follow! We can't let him pass, I can't go out like this. The moment I picked it up, I noticed... Wow. This feels good. I could have been running faster, what happened. So I surged to the end. My watch showed 4:05 something, and I was done. I sat on the curb to take my chip off, and then I started looking for Dee. She had to have been right on my ass.

There she was after the turn, but she was leaning BACKWARDS and as far right as her body would let her. Her eyes were big and she was OUT of it. I screamed, and she was moving. Her feet were going, and as she passed the finish line, she collapsed. I was there within 5 seconds. I was terrified and freaked out. She had red coming from everywhere on her mouth, teeth, tongue, lips. People were screaming for medics, and I yelled, "Help!" The medics got there and I told them she was bleeding. What's wrong, why's she bleeding?? Her eyes were as big as I don't know?? I just kept telling her, "I'm here, I love you, you're ok, I'm here." And all she kept saying was, "I tried to straighten up, I tried to straighten up." We got her from the finish to the street away from the finishers then to the grass, then to a wheelchair. Long story short, and I'm sure she'll tell her side in her blog. She was at a core temperature of 88, she was dehydrated and freaked out. Within 5 minutes, Lori was there. Then Ruth, then Trevor. 30-45 minutes and warmed up, we were all giggling and she was better. 3 cups of hot chicken broth, 5 blankets, lots of love, and she gave it her all.

Through all of this, I learned great things. I've grown as a person, I've started doing things I want to do. I started thinking for me. I switched coaches midway and did it for me, for reasons I wanted and it paid great dividends. I became closer to the friends that I always knew would be there for me and I've made several new friends I never thought I'd ever think. Before Team Rogue I had the stereo type that the fast runners were stuck up, now I know they're just like us slower runners. We all have the same issues, we are all battling the same things. We all want to better runners. I'd like to thank Karen for being the coach that got me to drink the Kool-Aid, for Ruth and Steve that made me think that nothing was too far out of my reach. For Meredith for trying to get me where I needed to be nutritionally, and boy do I have a ton of work to do. For Dee, she was my strength. We did everything together and CIM was all about us starting something together and ending something together. Lori, this race would have had a different outcome if she had not been there. Dee's husband Steve for putting up with us. For my Adrian for coming back into my life. I had gone full circle in this Team Rogue training. I've gone leaps and bounds in my life and it couldn't have been done without everyone's part. To all the fasties for all those 20 mile runs of having you guys pass me shirtless, and letting me act a fool. To Mike, to Larry, Ken, Bruce, Tausha, Kristen, Clemmie, Andrea, the Northies - Ash, Heidi, Andi, Andy, Brian, Josh, all you fools, Mae, James, etc., to Tim, Mandi... to all the people I thought before would never speak to a "slow" runner. I'm truly blessed to call you my friends.

I'm a Rogue forever.